September 27 - Affirm is Live Saving

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Sermon:  Sept 27, 2020 - Affirm is Life Saving, 

Carolyn Smith

Do you have your bingo card handy?? You’ve undoubtedly added a few spots under justice and music, and friends or faith!   Maybe this seems silly, or perhaps even inappropriate or rude, but we’re Busy and it helps us see all that we’re paying attention to. And These things are reverent and meaningful to us at St. Paul’s - important enough to be bold about!  Get ready to add another spot under J for Justice.  As we move towards our vote on being an Affirming Ministry for LGBTQ+ people,  It might be hard to wrap our heads and hearts around being so bold and nicely welcoming at the same time, being Public and Intentional and Explicit  AND remaining our friendly familiar selves.   Imagine what the neighbours will think.    Precisely.  We’ve created a comfortable space as St. Paul’s where we lean in to learn, striving for more justice even when it takes commitment.  We - those of us who see ourselves as St. Paul’s - do we want to share that widely?  Maybe that’s what justice means, offering our comfortable space to more people.  Except more people means new perspectives.  Inevitable change.  More discomfort.

A quote by Pam Rocker crystallized something for me - I heard her speaking to our United Church youth about her faith journey and her journey of leadership within the UCC -she’s widely known and not only because she is past president of Affirm United. You’ve seen her in the Affirming PIE video!  She named something about our love of a comfortable, welcoming church that was crystal clear: 

Our goal is not to feel comfortable all the time, so we can then allow other people to feel more comfortable  more of the time.   As we give up the need to feel fully comfortable all of the time, and are willing to feel discomfort some of the time, we make it possible for others to feel some comfort, for more people together to feel more comfortable.   

It’s like Pie - I take a smaller piece so you can have some too.   

And while other issues make headlines lately, and LBGTQ issues might seem colourful and simpler, it is easy to forget the truth that there is fear, there is hurt and there is despair.  And that much of it comes from lived experience of Church-based condemnation.  The truth is that Affirming Ministry saves lives.   In our neighbourhoods, Affirming churches saves lives.  I’ve got stats here from CamH (Canadian Mental health Association and Human Rights Campaign Foundations)   Depression is so high for LGBT people.   Hate crimes based on sexual orientation have been rising and are most violent of all hate crimes.      LGBQ youth are more than twice as likely to feel suicidal and more than 4 times likely to attempt suicide.   And 1/3 of trans youth have seriously considered it and one in 5 has made an attempt. 

Even a simple question about a gender neutral bathroom sign is life-saving - Trans students on College campuses denied access to washrooms are 45 percent more likely to try to take their own lives.   Even as adults, the life expectancy is 12 years younger than for the general population.  What saves them?  What protects them?   Love and connection. Family Support, Community support, us looking someone in the eye who has a broken heart and saying “I see you and I care.”  And churches that rise above the crowd and teach Relentless love and a Rainbow of affirmed diversity - they give permission to families to rediscover each other.  And to communities to understand and embrace each other’s gifts.  We have a unique way in the world of mending hearts and families. Affirming churches publicly intentionally explicitly pour God’s love and compassion into the broken places left from hateful misunderstood and misused messages.   For LGBT kids and adults,  Affirmation is antidote.  I’m talking my dear friends, my nephews, my friends’ kids.  My family and yours.  Such hope makes me feel bold, willing to speak up even if my voice shakes.  

Jesus met the Canaanite woman… this story comes after a string of all the stories we love - facing down the Pharisees, sharing bread and fish, walking on water… he is busy, he is making waves, reshaping the faithful image of the Kingdom of God.   And in his busy day of mission and meeting people,  a Mother calls to him for help, she’s frightened for her daughter,  the language is ‘possessed by a demon’ - and we wonder what is that?  But maybe we know too well.   Mental illness without adequate access to support.  Physical disabilities that marginalize, maybe anguish fuelled by racism or abuse for she is a foreigner, she is just a woman.   And the Canaanite mother asks Jesus,‘please, could he help her?’  Nothing…. Jesus doesn’t respond.    Let’s wonder about that…  The way our minds work, we naturally characterize, we sort things out… familiar, unfamiliar, colour, size, shape… and we sort them into safe and unsafe, allowed and not allowed. Even the best of us are always a moment behind our basic brains, behind our ingrained habits,  Maybe we don’t come up with a quick response, or our mind filters out things that don’t fit, maybe we’ve already been prejudiced.  And he was busy with his important focus to reshape his faith and culture… As a foreign woman,  it’s hard to even imagine her daring to approach him! Maybe for a moment, he hardly even made sense of her presence.  Was he caught just for a discomforting moment with unrealized prejudice drawn in his mind, separated from her?

 It is hard to hear the story continue: he says “My mission is only to the house of Israel, my food is for the children, not the dogs” which implies painfully, “Not for you .”  Demure feminine deference and manners out the window, this anguished and maybe angry mother summons her courage and, one can imagine her voice shaking as she boldly confronts him “ But Teacher, even the dogs eat the scraps that fall from the table.”  Truth has been spoken … What has happened for Jesus in this moment, but the vast and relentless truth of the Way of Love?  The kingdom is for her as well.  And he gives instant affirmation - “You have great faith.  Your daughter is healed.” Instantly the disciples knew, instantly the neighbours knew, instantly we know, and there is no further debate: the “Kindom of God is wide open, embracing you too and God rejoices that you are here.”   

Remember the bingo card?   What would Jesus put on it?  Oh, I’m sure he has a square for singing, and he appreciated a good meal too.  But would there be a square on there that wasn’t some way to seek greater justice? Would he choose one Justice and leave another out?   To gather more people in, and share love more abundantly?  Jesus is all about shaking up what’s comfortable — to discomfort some, so we can squeeze in and share with more people.  Imagine that mother that night, that whole family embracing their child, surrounded by friends,  reassured and affirmed by their community?   We boldly go, joyfully, with rainbows! called to share the kindom of heaven on earth.  Amen. 

Deborah Laforet